It's Not Just Adam and Eve anymore

"God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve."

If there's one line that bothers me more when it comes to the religious community's opposition to the right to love, you'd have a hard time finding it. There is only a partial truth in the above statement, and that is that God made those two human beings. Let me be very clear here. This is not an attack on the religious community by any means. But when a group's only argument against the LGBTQ's of this world is the whole Adam/Eve not Adam/Steve debate, it gets old, and quick.

When I first came out back in 2006, I was met with this statement from more than a few family members. I was made to feel as if how I felt was wrong, and that I was just going through a phase. I did a lot of soul searching, maybe they were right, I thought. Maybe it was a phase, maybe I was just confused. But the more I thought about it, the more I KNEW that wasn't the case. I knew that I was attracted to both men and women, and even though I'd grown up being told that was wrong, I couldn't help but feel the way that I felt.

Once I came out, another family member (who I'll not name here) took it upon herself to tell other members of my family, one being my Grandmother. My Nan, God love her, has a very deep faith, and was also raised with the belief that if its written in the bible, then it must be true. When she found out about my sexuality, she was disappointed. Hurt. But know who was hurt even more? Me. I felt as if I didn't really know her; that if she truly loved me, she'd accept me for who I am, sexuality and all. But that wasn't the case. And again I heard that age old argument of Adam/Eve, not Adam/Steve. And she wasn't the only family member to say so.

Look, I get it. Some people are happy being with the opposite gender, and that's perfectly okay. Just as same sex marriage is. What's the difference? Gay couples can have children through surrogates. Lesbian couples can have children through sperm donors. All that matters in the end is that the child/children resulting from that union are loved, protected, and raised to be productive members of society. And more often than not, they are.

But hold on, you say. Won't a child raised in that environment grow up to be gay or lesbian like their parents? Not necessarily. Some may, and that's alright. But many children who grow up in "straight" homes don't always turn out like their parents. All children need is love. They don't care if they have a mom and a dad, two moms or two dads. All they care about is that there is someone in this world who wanted them more than anything, and who will always love them unconditionally.

When I see the age old argument being made about gay and lesbian marriages, I often shake my head. I'm not for one minute mocking God and the Bible, (I myself am a woman of faith. A bisexual one, but who cares?) I just think that people need to not worry so much about it. Being LGBTQ is not a sin. Nowhere does it state in the ten commandments that "Thou shalt not lie with another person of the same gender". The Bible says not to kill, steal, commit adultery, covet thy neighbour's possessions, etc. But all too often in today's world, all these sins are committed. People die at the hands of others, and God forgives them. People steal, and are forgiven. If all two people are guilty of is loving each other, then I think people need to step back and take a good hard look at themselves.

Doesn't everyone deserve to be loved? Isn't that what everyone dreams of- to find that special someone, settle down, and build a life? Then who cares who we choose to do that with, whether it be male or female? Love is love no matter how you try to break it down. Adam and Eve, Adam and Steve, or Alexis and Eve. Its all the same. Maybe it's time to open up our minds and hearts and be a little more kind to those of us who choose a different path in life than what our families expected.

With peace, hope, love and understanding,
Krista (a proud member of the LGBTQ community)
xoxoxoxo

New poem. Untitled.

Crying, apologizing
Wearing a mask,
If you don't know how I'm feeling
Then maybe its best not to ask.
I don't want you to see it,
The pain that I feel
When I'm wearing a smile
Know that it's really not real.
Its only a cover, a mask and a shield
My weapon of choice, the one that I yield.
Fight the good fight, and maybe I'll win
And the smile I smile will be real again.
Until that day, I'll just keep on trying
And continue to hide the tears that I'm crying.

Happy Birthday Great Big Sea

On a day like today, wishing my favourite band a Happy Birthday doesn't seem like enough. Especially when that band has done more for you than they could ever know. So, here's what I could say to them if I could:

Thank you. I know that seems like such simple words, but trust me, there are a lot of reasons I have to say thank you to you guys.

For years, I felt different. I was never a part of the in crowd; didn't stand out, didn't fit in. I just went with the flow I guess, doing what I needed to get through. Then one day at school, I saw something that would forever change my life. A poster, "A Night with Alan Doyle and his guitar". I knew the name, so when I got home, I mentioned it to my mother. Tickets were only $10, so myself along with my mom and now stepfather, decided to go.

To be honest, that was one of the best decisions I ever made. From the first note I heard, I knew I was changed. I felt a connection to the music, and more importantly my home. The music made me happy, right down to the very depths of my soul. And its that very same music that got me through a very rough patch in my life- a year that saw my parents divorce, my father threaten to kill my mother, me hearing it all and subsequently giving a statement to the cops and seeing my father get arrested. Anyone else would've cracked under the weight of all that. But the music got me through.

Being diagnosed with autism didn't help matters much. It was another thing that set me apart. I finished school, but struggled on where to go and what to do next. I hated crowds, and avoided them. But that was until I attended my first concert at Mile One on December 18, 2004. There I felt safe, accepted, and free. I was finally somewhere where I fit in, and when you struggle your whole life to fit in, that feeling is one of the most amazing things I'd ever experienced. And that hasn't changed in the almost 12 years I've been a fan.

When times were rough it was the music that saved me, much like a hand reaching out and keeping me from falling. Through the deaths of friends and family and my own personal struggles, you guys were there whether you knew it or not. And when I actually did reach out for comfort or advice, you guys have been there. I honestly don't know how to say thank you enough for that. From the death of my cat to a family struggle, your kind words have seen me through. In my darkest hour, when I wanted to end my life, something pulled me back. And I firmly believe it was your music. You've kept me going when I simply wanted to quit.

Its through you guys that I have become friends with some of the most amazing people, most of whom are now like family to me. These friendships happened because of GBS. My best friend is now my roommate, and is like a sister to me. That wouldn't have happened if not for you guys. Heck, I even met my now ex through you guys. I've experienced a lot cause of you all.

Even through the leaving of several members, I've never lost my faith in you guys. Somehow I always knew that you'd keep going. When others thought you were done, I screamed "no way!". I knew they were wrong. I thank God they were wrong.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you for everything. Happy 21st Birthday, and I hope you guys keep rocking for a long time to come!

Much love,
Krista
xoxoxoxo

Weight Loss Update

So as you all know, I'm currently on a weight loss journey. But let me tell you what led to this major change.

Last year, tragedy struck my household. My beloved Cuddles was tragically hit by a car and was killed instantly. It absolutely broke my heart. I didn't know how to go on. But somehow, I did. Less than a month later, I had a dream about my weight. I could see the number on the scale in my dreams, and because my roommate/sister had recently bought a scale, I decided to weigh myself when I got up.

But nothing could've prepared me for the number I saw on the scale that day. 265.4. I was mortified. I couldn't believe that my weight had gotten out of control. But instead of letting it get any worse, I decided to do something about it. And it was on that day- June 20, 2013 - that I took the control back.

It was hard at first, I won't lie. There were days I felt hungry even if I ate enough. But eventually it got easier. I cut back on my snacking, drank more water, walked a bit. And slowly but surely, the weight started coming off. With each ten pound milestone, I've celebrated. There was less and less of me, and suddenly, I wanted to do more. As my weight loss inspiration Mark Hiscock said "The more you lose, the lighter you'll be on your feet, and you'll want to do more." And he was right.

I used to hate walking. I was winded easily, and it took forever to get anywhere. A simple flight of stairs in St. John's? Forget about it. Wasn't happening. But I noticed something this past weekend while visiting the city. While the stairs still hurt to climb, they didn't wind me as much as they used to. In fact, going up and down those stairs was a lot easier.

And walking now? I actually enjoy it. Its fun to get out and see and do things. I want to do more, and I love all the extra energy it gives me. Now I'm only 6.8lbs from the 50lb mark, and I can't believe how far I've come. I have curves now. Imagine. Haven't had those in a long time! I tried on a jacket that hadn't fit me since 2009, and now it fits again. Its the successes like that that keep me going.

To those of you out there struggling, please don't give up. I know weight loss isn't easy, but I promise you its worth it. You don't have to cut out your favourite food altogether. Just limit yourself. A small bag of chips at the end of the week. A can of pop here and there. You'll see results. Walk 15-20 minutes a day. Walk the dog, ride a bike... If its cold outside, dance or clean. Those things can burn major calories! But most importantly, maintain a positive attitude. YOU can do this! If I can do it, anyone can!

Starting weight: 265.4lbs
Current weight: 222.2lbs
Loss to date: 43.2lbs
Percentage change: 16.3%